More than a Cardboard Cut Out...

Ok, so this week has been really good. lots of great experiences to share with you all. I'm feeling a little sick today so that’s kinda discouraging but nothing I can't beat.

The other day, my district and I went to the Teaching Evaluation, where teachers evaluate you as you teach a lesson and give you feedback. Halfway through our lesson, our teacher stopped Elder Walking Eagle and I and gave us quite possibly the best advice I've received in the MTC so far. She told me to be myself. And she told me this because I was teaching the lesson like a robot. When I walked out of the building I realized that I was on my way to becoming the very thing I swore I would never be...A cardboard cut-out missionary! Oh the horror! the horror! For some reason, I thought that I had to be rid of my old self and find some completely new identity in order to be a good missionary, when in reality I will never be a good missionary if I'm not being myself! Since this epiphany things have been going a lot better and I'm a lot happier now that I'm not afraid to be myself. And my lessons have been much better because they are sincere instead of robotic. It's a great blessing to know that, while the Lord wants me to improve myself daily, he loves me for who I am and wants me to serve him in the best way I can--by being myself.

On Tuesday night's devotional, Elder Clate W. Mask of the seventy spoke and It was one of the best talks I've ever heard. His grandpa was a missionary in Mexico and was able to teach the president in 1910, and after that had government safety because the president loved them so much, just like Ammon! Anyway, he said something that really struck me; "Whatever your motives were for coming, you are where the lord wants you to be." It made me realize that my motives for coming here don't really matter anymore. What does matter is the fact that I am here, where the lord wants me to be! In other words, being here is the motive to be here on its own, if that makes sense.

Getting along with my companion was a real struggle this week. Luckily, every Wednesday we have companionship inventory, which is a meeting just between us when we talk about things we need to work on and any problem we had. It took a good half hour to forty five minutes, but my companion and I were able to throw everything out on the table and work all of our problems out. It was really hard, but with the Lords help we were able to resolve our differences. I'm sure there will be more things for us to work out every week. But It's great to know that even two people as different as we are can be unified through the spirit.